By Bosun Bankole
A young man who wanted to sign up for the spouse connect service I coordinate expressed his concerns about women to me. In his exact words ‘being with a woman these days can be complicated, while you are still thinking of having fun and getting to know her, she expects you to make a marriage proposal.
‘It does not work that way’, he concluded. While I could empathize with him, I felt sorry for the women he had a relationship with in the past. My question here is what else would a woman who is above twenty-five expect from a relationship, movies and dinner all year long? Of course, she is thinking about marriage and the guy she is in a relationship with should worry if she is not thinking about marriage.
I have this serious admonition I have wanted to pass on to unmarried men for a while, especially the Christian ones. Being a man does not give you the right to be emotionally irresponsible. You cannot keep a lady so close to you, constantly fulfilling your emotional needs and assume she is just a friend.
The most annoying statement I get is ‘she knows there is nothing between us’. Well, knowing there is nothing between you will not stop her from hoping your friendship will develop into something more, particularly if you keep hanging around her and running to her every time you yearn for some intimacy. To make matters worse, the lady is socially precluded to make the first move at a proposal, so she keeps smiling while struggling to read meanings to the hand holding, and frequent night calls.
One of my favourite Nigerian words is ‘how far’. It is Pidgin English, safe to be referred to as Nigeria’s second lingua franca. ‘How far’ could mean different things …Read More
Source:: The NET
